Thank you jugo for confirming my idea of opening something like this.
I have to admit that I am not pretty good by writing short-stories, as I've said I'm more a poetry man, but hey! Let's see if some of you like it or not.
These two stories were taken from my first short-story collection, called 'based on true events'.

When we were...
I remember… the day when we met, the hour when we talked, the minute when we just looked at each other, the moment when I was between your suave arms. When you embraced me and I felt like a scared little boy who runs to his mother who protects him, felt like a man who was chased by the darkness then finally found his rest on dawn’s silky line, cosseted by the first rays of sun. I remember…
I dreamt about a kiss on a beautiful day which thou will not give me like a friend does to a friend, which thou will breathe to my face as a lover does to a lover . I hoped a day will come when you’ll wake up and feel what I felt. Want what I wanted. I prayed whether you’ll tell me once on your beautiful voice… I love you.
When we were special friends, when we were in friendly love, when I was your secret admirer…
I remember… the day when we slept together, the hour when we watched the stars on the sky, the minute when we whispered into each other’s ears, the moment when I laid on your bed close to you and I felt your magical smell and it floaded my nose and made me fly over a wonderful hill, covered by the most beautiful flowers in the world, made me feel that I am a human with feelings. I remember…
I dreamt about a night when there’ll be no time, no world, not anything but we and just we. I hoped a love which I knew never could come true but let the hope die last. Let the hope live forever, imagined as a lightning candle which can’t be slake by anything. I prayed whether you’ll enamel my face with tearful eyes. Tears of happiness.
When we were special friends, when we were in friendly love, when I was your secret admirer…
I remember… the day when we hang out together, the hour when we got so close to each other, the minute when we laughed the best, the moment when I kissed your beautiful face. And your long brown hair tickled my nose which was floaded by your tasty smell and you whispered my name into my ears, told me that I’m a good friend and then you kissed me too and you smiled and made me the happiest. I remember…
I dreamt about a day thou will marry me and kiss my lips. I hoped in the dream that maybe come true that we live in the happiest happiness together and nothing ever could stop, tear or broke us. I prayed whether a moment will ever come when we will love each other for forever & ever, ever after.
When we were special friends, when we were in friendly love, when I was your secret admirer…


You remember me?

Do you remember all of your dreams you’ve ever seen? While you were sleeping. Have you ever had déjà vu because of something you’ve seen in one of your dreams before?

The St. Mark Street is nearly empty, except an old man with his wife who are going home from the market, and Billy who’s actually going to school. He is 17 and lives in this street, which is not so far from New Mann’s Secondary School where he goes. But he is still in hurry because waking up this morning took twenty minutes instead the usual five.
Billy had a beautiful dream. While he was sleeping. He always fantasized about a young, cute, delightful and beautiful brown haired girl. He imagined many times that once they’ll meet somewhere and how will it happen and all the things. But he never dreamed about this girl. At least, till this morning.
In his dream they had a date. They were walking in a beautiful park and talked when suddenly the girls took his hand. Then they stopped walking and turned face to face each other. They looked at each other thru some minutes when the girl embraced him and wanted to kiss him. Before their lips could meet, Billy woke up. But this dream was more wonderful than any of his fantasizes before. And it was just too beautiful to be true…

In the school he can’t really concentrate on any lessons, not even on his favourite, literary-lesson. He just thinks on his beautiful dream and smiles anytime when he remember about how the dream-girl looked into his eyes. ’I wish it could happen once for real!’ he thinks ’But it’s just too beautiful to be…’
-Hey man, what’s up? – asks Johny, one of his friends. – You were so silent at all day and it’s not your usual style, man… Got a problem or something?
-Nah, I’m fine thanks.
-You say so?
-Yeah!
-Great. But if there’s something wrong, turn to Johny. – both of them smile.
-I will.
-Fine, then see you later. – Johny goes away. Billy thinks he should tell about his dream to Johny…
-Hey Johny! – the man turns back. – Ah, nothing. See you.

When the school is over Billy goes to the Maddison Park which is a popular place of his school-mates. He takes a sit on a bench, grabs his exercise book and a pen and starts writing. He’s a writer for years and a lot of his arts based on his fantasizes about his dream-girl. Even the story he’s actually writing.
About a half an hour later Tommy, one of his class-mates comes and as he sees Billy he sits next to him.
-Hello, lucky boy! – he sais.
-Oh, hy! – Billy stops writing and puts his exercise book and pen back to his bag. – How you doin’? – Tommy seems not to care about his question.
-Man, just tell me, did you kiss her?
-Wha? – Billy doesn’t understand what Tommy’s talking about.
-C’mon, don’t play the innocent! How was it? Does she do it fast or, or slow, how was it? C’mon you can tell it to me, I promise that I won’t tell it to anyone! – his phone rings and he picks up. – Eh? Yeah, when? – Billy is trying to understand the situation, but he’s got not much success. – Now?! Okay, I’ll be right there! – and Tommy stands up.
-Tommy, what…
-I gotta go, but next time you gonna tell it to me, okay?
-But what…
-See you lucky boy! – and he runs away.
-Tommy wait! – but the guy doesn’t hear it.

Billy is on his way home. He still tries to understand what Tommy talked about. He could clearly remember about that sentence ’C’mon you can tell it to me…’ but the truth was that he couldn’t.
’Maybe he was just kidding…’ he thinks ’Yea, okay Tommy, you made a joke on me I see. Nice idea. How was it, eh? How was you when you…’
-Billy! – a woman’s voice wakes him out of thinking. Nince to see you, how are you? – Jessica is talking like they haven’t talked years ago.
-Hey Jess, I’m fine thanks. And you? – but Jess seems not to care about his question.
-Yea, my bad I’m asking stupid. Of course you’re fine!
-What do you mean?
-Oh you innocent sheep! – says Jess and she smiles. – After a so beautiful meeting you’ve had… you must be fine.
-I don’t know what are you talking about.
-Of course you don’t… Oh Billy did you sware you gonna play silence of a lamb in the rest of your life or what?
-Look, Jess…
-Everyone knows what a lucky guy you are…
-So please tell me why!!!
-Hah, it’s miserable!
-Yeah maybe, but I still don’t know what is this shit! At first I met Tommy, and now I met you and both of you asked me to tell something I don’t fucking remember!
-You selfish bastard! – Jessica makes an ugly mimic and hurries away. And Billy is just standing alone on St. Mark Street and starts to think all this out, but anyhow he tries, same results. Maybe he is crazy or maybe everybody else is crazy.

When he finally arrives home he takes a long, deep breath. Being at home never made him such a good feeling as it makes now. He decides he’ll stay at home all day long. He don’t want to meet other people and especially don’t want to hear anymore ’how was it?’. After he ate a sandwich he tries to relax, but as soon as he sits to the sofa the phone starts ringing.
-Fuck! – he says and stands up. He goes back to the living room and picks the phone up:
-Speak!
-Billy! How many times do I have to tell you that when you pick the phone up you should say ’Hello’ or ’Hallo’.
-Yeah, good day to you too, mom.
-How was your day?
-Quiet shit. – long silence. – So what you want?
-’What do you want’ Billy, don’t talk in sleng!
-Whatever. Mom you never phoned me to ask how my day, so let’s just say the main!
-How was it? – as mom says these words, Billy got frozen by the dread. Does mummy got also crazy?
-Wha-what do you me-mean?
-Ohh, come on! My son, I know you were always a shy boy, but you can tell it to mummy!
-But what?
-Your date!
-What date? I hadn’t got a date!
-Tommy called me up and told me that she’s beautiful!
-Who?
-Son! Stop it! If you don’t want to talk about it tell me, but don’t play the fool!
-Mom I would tell everything with so much pleasure if I could know what the fuck are you all talking about! It’s okay that my friends are kidding me, but my own mom! – and he picks the phone down.
He came home to have a relax, but now he realises that he can’t have a rest. Nowhere, not even at home. Especially that the phone starts ringing again…
-Fuck you all! – Billy shouts to the empty room, grabs his jacket and go outside.

Tommy is the first Billy meets on the street. He’s smiling but Billy catches him by his jacket and throws him to the wall.
-And now talk!
-Hey man what the fuck is wrong, I thought we were friends!
-Yea, but what is this shit all about?
-Man I didn’t think you’ll get so hurt because of my mistake… that I interested…
-So you admit it?
-Yeah, yeah, I do.
-I knew… for fuck’s sake!
-I’m sorry man. I was just interesting… - Billy seems confused again.
-Interested?
-Aye.
-In what?
-Man I wanted to see her…
-Who?
-You said she’s perfect, so I’ve followed you, but that’s all. I just wanted to see that ’perfect girl’ of your dreams.
-Tommy… maybe I’m crazy but… I don’t remember. – both guys are looking at each other thru long minutes, then Tommy whispers:
-You don’t exist…

This sentence was echoed with that whispering voice in Jason’s head when his mother woke him up at morning… also woke him out from his mistic dream.
-’morning son!
-Jesus! I’ve had an awesome dream!
-I believe that! – mother smiles. – After yesterday’s events you’ll have awesome dreams for a long time! – mother still smiles.
-What do you mean? – Jason asks but his mo’ seems not to care about his question…
-How was it? – she asks instead of answering her son’s question. Jason suddenly froze down and the frighten that takes the lead over his body makes him hurt.
-Wha-what do you… mean? – he looks at her mo’ but she’s still smiling. – Sorry mum, I gotta go I’m in late! – he stands up, takes his clothes and bag and go out.
As he walks on the street he doesn’t even try to understand anything, he just tries to think about anything else. He and his mother moved here only a week ago, but Jason already doesn’t like this street. It’s nearly always empty, like people were have to live in fears and doubts to come out. As well as now, the street is empty except and old man with his wife, who are going home from the market, and Jason who’s actually going to school.
He can’t remember if he could see those old people, but they’re so familiars yet… and just then he sees the table on the wall of his house: St Mark Street…

Some minutes later he arrives to the park which is right beside the school. He walks slowly and smokes the fresh air. Then a girl comes. A young, cute, delightful and beautiful brown haired girl he has never seen before. Or supposing he would so?
The girl walks up beside Jason and they continue walking together, but none of them say anything. Jason’s afraid of looking into her eyes, and that smile… like his mum’s smile at morning. ’She’s just too beautiful to be trues…’ – remember Jason when suddenly the girl took his hand. Then they stop walking and turn face to face each other. The girl is still smiling then she asks:
-You remember me?

hey, not bad! good addition to the place too.

i liked the first one more, but then i'm in a romantic mood at the moment...

I very well enjoyed that! That was very good in my humble opinion. I love how you describe the situations which matter, like shouting at the empty room... they add to the feel of the story. What I also like is the change over when he wakes up.. it's a common idea but you made good use of it, so that was very good to me. Also, the fact the guy responds aggressive after more and more people start to talk about 'her', is that something you wrote down about yourself?

The story itself, with the girl, reminds me of some time ago about something that happened to me. I wrote this little event down because it was stuck in my head for a few days and I didn't want to forget it... I can post it later just to show you what I mean. It's not that clever and well written as yours but I just might give it a go.

Btw, I thought the first story was written from the eyes of the girl in the second story. I don't know if that's what you wanted it to be but I thought it made the circle complete

most of my stories are romantic




Of course, give it a go, I would like to read it. First because I like to read, second because I just learn by other people's experience, third because this thread is for that.

And thank both of you guys.

Ehm, and here is the cover of the first collection:

And the content (just if you interesting in other stories, tell the title and I upload):

Let me be your fantasy
Girlspotting
Old Skool
Moments I'm in the sky, hours I'm nowhere
When we were...
You remember me?
Memories I am keeping
Old Skool 2
The Beauty And The Beat
Special Needs
When I became [human]

i don't have words

Old Skool 2 please!

Old Skool 2

„How are you little sh*tty?”
I’m fine thanks, but I feel pain in my face, because last time you hit it. One punch, two punches, one hit, one kick. You feel the ground? Lying in your own blood. How do you feel?

2 years. 2 years later I am still alive. No matter how do I feel or how did I survive, I am here. I spent this time with a great fear inside… everyday. As soon as the school finished I hurried to home, sometimes I ran and sometimes I spent long hours by hiding before some dangerous face. At home I felt safe. Yea, sometimes I was out of luck, so then it was hurt. But there was one good thing in it. After they beated me I could go and just go. I didn’t have to afraid, because once they did it they let me go. There’s something good in every thing.
I never advertised that I wrote poems. I never told it to anyone, but someone always saw if I actually wrote.
„Poets have gone. Poems have gone. So what are you doing?” When two men held my arms and didn’t let me do anything, the third gangsta always asked it.
„I am doing something you will never be able to do.” – I usually said. And I got the right punishment I deserved… from their viewpoint. And when I was down and spitted blood I became so angry that I didn’t feel pain till I got the next kick into my belly because I said: „What’s up f*ckers? Is that your best?”
No matter. I didn’t care. I hated people and I didn’t want to be in a company, I was just alone. But when I was eight I became to know some girls. I realised they like me, and not just me, they liked what I’ve done. Beside I became to know them I was able to know love. I fell in love and that could make me happy. But when I’ve fallen this happiness has broken down again. As the girl rejected me that was worse than the beats I got sometimes.
So I became a lonely man again. I just walked my way, tried to do what I felt I have had to do. Sometimes I thought about life. I never could find the answer to the question I always wanted to know: is my life good?
I had so many questions but I never could answer them. I just lived day-by-day, hated and slowly I started to write about death… again. But then I didn’t imagine that as the things and people I was afraid about, I wanted to know what is that really about.
I laughed on people as they just lived and said that life is good. I had to laugh, because they were afraid about Death. And slowly all of the people thought I was mad. No one could understand me. So I had to laugh…

So I ask you: was I right? Was I mad because I hated people and laughed on them? Am I still mad? Who am I?

A FACE IN THE CROWD.

It is a dark, rainy day on a Tuesday in December, and I'm supposed to get my train at 19:13. I have been busy all day and I have just one appointment left. It's one of those days in which the time goes twice as fast and there is hardly a moment to realise what is actually going on. As I'm eating my dinner while leaning on the kitchen table, I look at the clock. 19:05. Fuck, I'm late. Again. I leave my food on the table, grab my jacket, bag and scarf. I slam the door behind me while I yell 'bye!' to anyone who's interested enough to listen. Because my bike was stolen a few days before and my brother's bike is nowhere to be found I have no option left but to run: things really tend not to co-operate at all when I am in a rush. It must be some kind of universal rule. Whatever it is, it's not helping. The clock in the kitchen helps though, it's 5 minutes ahead of its time. Too bad I forget about this fact when I see the clock in my hurry.

I had been living my entire life in this small town, so I know every corner of it. I take some shortcuts through small alleys and gardens which I can't enter by bike. I go to the muddy road which is parallel with the train track. I decide to take a shortcut over a fence so I can skip the tunnel, a roundabout and more muddy roads. I walk to the trainstation by walking next to the railtrack and I climb up the train departing platform. I'm surrounded by darkness, as there are no lights at this place on the station. As I walk towards the small crowd, I see a few heads staring in my direction. They're looking at me, probably since they saw me appear from this dark place. They must have been wondering how and why I got there. I don't really care about them watching me. I made it in time.

I walk up to the waiting room where those people are standing. As I pass by them I stare at the ground to prevent eye contact. Not because I'm shy, but because I don't like the feeling of people looking at me at this moment. I can sense they suspect me of something, so I avoid them by not giving away some of my own attention. And time. By not looking they aren't there to me, and that's exactly what I need. But it also gives me the idea I'm alone in this crowd, but they are wondering what and I know why. Somehow, that feels great.

After I pass those people I hear the loud noise of the train approaching from behind. Even though the clock gave me some extra minutes, I hardly made it. I decide to stop walking until the train stops. I look up to watch the front of the train slowly drive by me. As I follow it with my eyes I suddenly made eyecontact with a girl next to me, which seems to have been looking at me before I noticed her. We are both stunned for a moment, which feels longer than it actually is. It freezes the time for a while. We keep staring eachother in the eyes until she suddenly says 'hi' in the cutest and sweetest way I could ever imagine, probably to break the ice. She quickly turns her eyes away as she's saying this. As she turns towards the train I respond quickly with a lousy 'hi' as well. I can't think of anything better to say so I just copy her. Usually I'm more spontanious. Maybe I'm rushed from trying to make it to the trainstation, maybe I'm too stunned by the look in her eyes? I see her smile and blush a bit after I responded to her. This simple gesture makes me feel my simple 'hi' does more justice to her than I expected it would. Then the train stops with screeching brakes.

She walks towards the traindoor, just like everyone that's waiting together with us. The traindoors open and all the people that get off the train rush careless through the waiting crowd like ants. They probably have no reason to be rushing like I was because they are coming home from work. I guess they're just stuck in their daily routine. Once they're all out of the train the crowd I'm in start to move again. One by one we enter the train. Even though we're all part of the same cluttered mass, I don't lose sight of her. We're all squeezing and pushing to get in a traincompartment but I find myself a place. The weirdest thing of all is the fact that I'm alone in this compartment, on the left side of the train. Three empty places, one taken by me. After the last person walks by, I can see the right compartment. Three empty places, one taken by her.

The train takes off and I turn my music on. We have a brief moment of eyecontact again, so I turn my head towards the window. I soon figur the window functions as a mirror as it's dark outside. Even though I would never forget her face I look at her in the reflection. She seems to be copying me this time, as she figures out this alternative mirror a little moment later than me. As soon as she sees me looking at her, I look away. I wasn't shy when I walked towards a whole crowd of people that were collectively watching me. This time I'm more than shy of this one girl sitting on the other side of the train. In turns, we look at eachother. If I see her looking, she would blink nervously and look in a different direction. If she sees me, I do the same. It becomes some kind of peek-a-boo game. But we smile.

The train stops after a few minutes, on the first halting-place. Only a few get on the train but noone gets off. This makes me wonder. The final destination is at quite a big city, so everyone on the train must live there. One halting-place left before we're there. As the train starts to accelerate, I continue to look at her. I should've known by now she's thinking the same. As she catchs me in the act I laugh to hide my shiness. She smiles again and turns her eyes to the phone in her hand. I turn the volume of my music down a bit because I want to approach her. I want to say something friendly. She's busy with her phone so I figured I don't want to distract her. Plus, I can't think of anything to say. I turn my volume up again and do my best to look outside this time. But I'm fed up with myself, and her phone.

I notice the train starting to slow down after a while. Other people notice this as well, as I hear some people zip their coats. One by one, people stand up and walk towards the traindoors. Then, she suddenly stands up aswell and joins the waiting line. The train stops slowly, and I hear the air pressure of the traindoor. The crowd with her in it starts to become impatient, and slowly moves towards the exit as the door opens. As fast as I had been living that day, she disappears in the moving mass. There was something about her that makes her stand out of this crowd because I saw something of myself in her. Wen I lose sight of her, I'm not alone in the traincompartment. There's me, and my reflection.

The distance between the final destination and the trainstation I'm at is very short. I listen to my music some more before I decide to go to the door. Some people are ahead of me and even though I know this, I walk to the traindoor and join the waiting line. Just like everybody else, I want to get off the train. The traindoors open, we get off the train and we rush through the waiting crowd like ants. I blend in with the mass to become a stranger like her, back in the rush. But I have a reason to be rushing. I'm stuck in my daily routine.

~Leslie

wish i could write stuff like that man honestly, it must be a great skill to have

great work carma and mightyshite

I'm very glad Mightypoo that you let me read it. Because this story is pretty good to me, let me copy you: I very well enjoyed that.
See what I like:
I like these expressions that you use:
"all the people that get off the train rush careless through the waiting crowd like ants"
This metaphor is very good. Ants came from the Prodigy ant, or it just came like that?

"and my brother's bike is nowhere to be found"

I like it much. You could simply write "and I can't find my bro's bike" or something like this, but you did this instead. I never see that I can express myself like this.

"I yell 'bye!' to anyone who's interested enough to listen"

No reason why, I just like it.

See what I love:
The finish. You described why people hurry and I was smiling, cos yeah, that's pretty true. And then at the end you let us know you're kinda similar, or even the same as them.
I like this kinda finishing of a story, I also used it in some of my stories, like describing people to be something, then at the end you can figure out that I'm the same.


Here, I send another story of mine. This is not a pretty best of story ever, but I very well like it. It is a bit similar to yours. The main line of it is also a girl disappearing. Let me know what you say



Sm1le

Past – the beginning

I do honest everything as I am sitting on my chair. I honest that I’ve seen you again and we talked. I honest my room, my chair, the music, even that I’m hungry. Oh yes, I do. You ask why? Because I love Ania. Because anytime I see her I become a king. At least, I feel myself being a king. However, she’s like a drug. Causes addiction. Anytime I get it, I want more and more.
But if the truth has to be known, I am sad when it’s over. I only smile until it holds on, until she’s right before my eyes. And in reality. Imagination can’t help on it, cause no matter how strong I try to imagine that I am with her, I always know somewhere deep inside that it’s false. So it only helps if she’s really right before my eyes.
Just like minutes ago, when we sat on the train until I got off. I smiled. And I still smile, but now it feels different. She’s not here to realize my smile. And even when she’s with me and realizes my smile, it’s all empty. It right goes to anywhere but not to her. She knows it all, but she would better like to pretend herself if she wouldn’t know it at all. But there’s a million reason why I smile.
I do because I don’t want her to know how I’m suffering about her. I do because I’m afraid if she’s going to know it, maybe she’ll tell me not to meet for a while. I also do it, because I am happy that at least she’s my friend. I also do it, because I know that I am not her friend. And another plenty of reasons.
Anything I do when we’re together seems to be false. It’s only because I can’t live without her, I want her so much she could hardly ever imagine. And because she does not love me I feel bad, depressed, bored. I feel myself suffering. But I pretend myself to be allright, because I don’t want her to know it all, even that I know that she already knows it all. So no matter what do I do when I’m with her, all false. The only true thing what I do is my smile. That’s also a reason why I smile. Because that comes from my heart.
So I do deny myself.

Past – in the middle

I do honest when we meet. But I do not miss her if she’s not with me. And I still smile when she’s with me. Strange, isn’t it? I still wish and dream if we could be together, but I’ve already give up everything. She can’t be mine, anyhow I try. No matter what I do, it’s never good enough.
I’m over the drama of Ania, and it’s something new. She, somehow, gets closer to me, becomes a friend of mine even better and better. At first I’m afraid that it’ll cause that I’ll fall in love with her again, althought I never ever said I wouldn’t love her. Cause I still love her, but it’s different somehow. Then I get calmed, cause I can control myself. And we’re happy together.
But I still deny myself.
As the weeks passes, I realize that there is still a little hope in me that you’ll fall in love with me, so everything you receive from me is someone, who would like you to fancy him. So you don’t receive me, myself, you receive someone else. And it’s bad.

Present – the end

Everything lost. I have lost everyhing, I could say. You’re faraway from me, somewhere on this planet, which I don’t know where it is located. You live your life on your own, so as I. I do not deny myself anymore, cause I am me and I won’t change for anyone. For anyone, like you.
I stopped pretending myself to be someone else. To be that guy you’ve tried to make him be your friend. He was. I was. But everything changed. Only two things remained. One of them is the little hope in me that you’ll fall in love with me, the other is the smile on my face. Only the good things can survive. A reason why these two things remained.
But I was not that someone else anymore. I gave myself to you and you denied it. You did not need me. Our paths divorced and now we’re far from each other. I do miss you a bit, so I wish if I could have some connections with you.
I must be lucky, cause when I am heading to my friend I meet your brother. I ask him if he could give me your number. He can. So I am happy and smiling again. I call you up if we could meet sometime and you say that yes, we could. But you do no know the exact time so – you say – you will call me back some days later and we put the phone down. I am waiting for your call over three days.
Over a week.
Over a month.
Over two months.
Nothing happens. You do not want to meet me, or you forgot to call me up? I do not suppose to think that people are bad. So I do not think about any bad thing, insted I write a short message to you. I tell you that I miss you a bit, we should meet. Call me or write me back – I say. I push the button and it’s processing. Messega delivered – it says then. So you received my message, you’ll read it. You’ll know it. I do not suppose to think that you are bad, so you’ll call me up or write me back, won’t you? Of course you will. I am waiting for your call over three days.
But nothing happens. But I do smile. From the two things, which remained from the beginning, now only one left. I’ve lost that little hope that you’ll fall in love with me. But I still have the smile. Only the strongest can survive. It seems that my smile was the strongest. Well, I’m staring out my window, wondering what it is that I should have said.